Scion of NLP

Posts Tagged ‘anita’

Okay…this was originally posted on Facebook by a wonderfully insightful NLPer, Anita, and I thought the information in it was so important I just have to share it with you…

Many times I hear people pronouncing”truths” about NLP (as if in a church), which obviously are based upon a non-understanding of what it is.

They say, “It doesn’t work.” At that point I look around and ask “Where?” “Where is this thing?”

They look upon me and say “What thing?” I say, “NLP. You said it doesn’t work. Where NLP? Can you make it?”

What specifically does not work or did not work for you?

They name techniques or a technique, name lists upon lists of techniques until my brain is fried.

I take a deep breath, look upon them and…..

I say. “So you say Phobia Cure did not work. How do you know he had one”? ” He told me”, they say.

And you believed him? Why? How did you make sure he really had one. If he didn’t you may have installed one, you know? if you did, you must NOW install a Phobia for a Phobia, which is easy. Just play a slightly different movie and add JAWS soundtract to it.

DONE.

What is he wanted to have one but didn’t get it YET. It is useful to have phobias of certain things.

For instance, Mother in Law phobia (that however can be cured with laxative tea at dinner when they visit SUDDENLY) and play the Jaws soundtract (gently) in the background.

Here is my response to them.

NLP techniques which are numerous, by themselves do not work. They are the tools we use within specific contexts. A tool, however great, is a usless tool unless applied for specific reasons in a specific context, with a specific, verifiable outcome to be achieved.

In order for these great tools to work, I tell them, they need to go back to the “drawing board” and be able to delineate the parameters of the context they are deling with. Make sure you are dealing with what you are told. If he says he a has a phobia, make darn sure it is and that he doesn’t want it.

Nine times out of ten, they have a different problem from the one they want you to believe they have.

Sometimes all they want is a “date”-with you..someone to spill their guts in front of, without any intention of having anything changed, expecting nurturing……… For this purpose, obviously, you will reach out for different tools ( I have a few for emergencies).

I think, by the way, these 8 year long weekly therapist visits are nothing else than contextualized dates. After that many years, people know each other better than spouses. Speaking of polygamy…….

They need to employ the observational skiils, listening skills and question- asking skills, to gather as much information as they can, in order to figure out the situation and how the context had been created.

When they are sure to be sure that surely they know what outcome they are wanting to get, the art begins.

Only then, are the tools useful to elicit the desired outcome (MAKE SURE, IT IS DESIRED, not just by you but by THEM).

In our view, training practitioners needs to be based on the principle of teaching a structure. Students must “organically be drawn to structure delineation. Once we know the structure of the client’s experience, we know how they consistently achieve a particular state, and what they want to change and why, our job is really easy. A structure of anything, including an emotional state ceases to be the the structure if the foundational elements are rearranged or removed.

In order to make a difference in someone’s life, we need to be able to reconstruct for ourselves the model of the world that client had been creating for themselves, understand the structure of it, design a new one that works, use the tools and then verify from our own and a client’s standpoint that this we wanted to achieve had been achieved WITHIN THE ECOLOGY OF THE CONTEXT.

Unfortunately there are many people out there who do not understand the elegance of these methods, and their power. They go into the world teaching others NLP and doing ineffective work with clients, leading to a misunderstanding of this incredible methodology and Richard Bandler’s original intent in Santa Cruz.

Its’ time for a CHANGE!

(The Original Facebook Note was written
by Anita Maria Koslowski)

So…if you’re ready for a change, and you want to learn the tools, techniques — along with the “elegance of these methods, and their power” — please check out the upcoming NLP Practitioner Certification Training Program being taught in Victoria, BC (starting in less than 4 weeks!)… you can find more information here: